Nigerian scams keep making me laugh Options

[james]

I get a few of these every week via email - this one's great (copied as sent, linebreaks and all):

From: w.miner@virgilio.it
Subject: i guarantee you that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement
Date: 14 June 2006 12:17:53 BDT
Reply-To: glogate@mail.az

FROM: DR MORIS HEART DATE: 13th june


SIR,
MADAM

I am DR MORIS HEART.the Manager Foreign Operations department
of

a prime bank here in South Africa. My search for a trustworthy

individual/firm has led me to you. I came across your contact

while
looking for a worthwhile investments or projects that I can

be
affiliated with.I am writing you this letter to ask for your

support
and co-operation to carry out this transaction.

THE PROPOSITION
A
foreigner, Late ENGINEER DAVID CHING CHEN, from Taiwan a Gold,

Diamond merchant/Contractor with the federal Government of South

Africa, until his death\on board the American Flight 587, an

Airbus
A300 left JFK, bound for Dominican Republic that crashed

in Queens
New York, USA. Banked with us here and had a balance of

US$120,000,000.00 (ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY MILLION UNITED STATES

DOLLARS) which the bank now expects a next of kin to claim as

beneficiary, Valuable efforts are being made by our bank to get

in
touch with any of the Chen's family or relatives but to no

success.
It is because of the perceived possibility of not being

able to
locate any of Late Engr, David Ching Chen next of kin (he

had no wife
nor children that is known to us). The management

under the influence
of our Chairman and members of the Board of

Directors are making
arrangement for the funds to be declared

"UNCLAIMED" and will be lost
to the Federal Government or

subsequently be donated to the Trust
Fund for Arms and Ammunition

to further enhance the course of war in
West Africa and Southern

Africa.

In order to avert this negative
development, some of my

colleagues and I now seek your permission to
have you stand as a

next of kin to Late Engr, David Ching Chen so
that the funds

USD120M would be released and paid into your account
as the

beneficiary next of kin. All documents and proves to enable
you

get this fund will be carefully worked out. We have secured from

the probate an order of mandamus to locate any of deceased

beneficiary and more so we are assuring you this business is 100%

risk free involvement. Your share stays while the rest would be

for
myself and my colleagues for investment purposes. According

to
agreement within both parties. As soon as we receive an

acknowledgement of this message in acceptance of our mutual

business
proposal, we will furnish you with the necessary

modalities and
disbursement ratio to suite both parties without

any conflict.

We
have agreed that 30% of the money will be for you for your

assistance
in this transaction, while 10% has been mapped out for

expenses that
will be incurred on both sides in the course of

this transaction and
10% will be donated to the charity

organization while50% will be for
my colleagues and I. If this

proposal is acceptable by you do not
make undue advantage of the

trust we have bestowed on you, then
kindly get to me immediately.

Please furnish me with your most
confidential Telephone and Fax

Number.

Regards,
DR moris HEART.

I love this bit:

making arrangement for the funds to be declared "UNCLAIMED" and will be lost to the Federal Government or subsequently be donated to the Trust Fund for Arms and Ammunition to further enhance the course of war in West Africa and Southern Africa

Genius

[paul]

Where do I sign up????

[Aly]

Whoa Paul, hold on a minute. My spidy sense is telling me this is a scam and should be avoided. Don't ask me why, I've just got this gut instinct that something isn't right.....

I used to work in an office where I had to filter the emails and separate the junk from genuine conference bookings (it was as shite boring as it sounds) and would get over 50 a day from Nigerians trying it on. I never realised how many diamond mines there are out there and how many unfortunate souls have lost their lives due to Airbuses falling out of the sky!

This post has been edited by Aly: Jun 14 2006, 03:40 PM

[paul]

I think your wrong Aly. This seems like a sure fire way of making me a cool $12mill. There can surely be no way it could fail?!?!

After all Uncle DAVID CHING CHEN and I were very close.

[Aly]

Sorry, I hadn't noticed this bit:

We have secured from

the probate an order of mandamus to locate any of deceased

beneficiary and more so we are assuring you this business is 100%

risk free involvement.

You are quite right. Carry on.

[quaker]

im in !